Day 14 (My open letter to anyone who has temporarily forgotten their humanity):
“Be Heard. You never know who might be listening.”
In my search for just the right people to join Osu United a few days ago, I googled as many martial arts studios I could find in BC that work with children. I found this in my search and was initially pleased: “At True Fighter’s MMA, our youth programs are designed to instill confidence and aid children in developing to their fullest potential.”
However, when I went to their Facebook page, I was very disappointed. Beneath a profile picture of two fighters hugging and one kissing the other’s face members were posting discriminatory comments: “I thought this was a gay hotline not true fighters… perhaps a better profile pic? never mind this is the best!” and “No homo?!”
When I read these comments, I was angry. All I could think of was how would these men explain themselves to children being bullied for being gay or being called gay? How would they explain themselves to parents like the single mother of Seth Walsh, a 13 yr old boy who committed suicide after being bullied for being gay. How could the managment say they aid children yet allow discrimination under their brand at the same time? I didn’t - and don’t - understand how they can be so willingly blinded by ignorance (and no, defending the photo as not being gay doesn’t count in not tolerating discriminating comments - it does quite the opposite). However, I have a choice - retaliate with “an eye for an eye” which results in making everyone blind OR find a reason for gratitude.
I choose gratitude.
Today I am grateful for SIDA/AIDS Moncton which was one of the first charities for which I volunteered. As a 16 year old kid, I came under fire from homophobic adults who wanted to shut down a simple AIDS walk. I’m thankful that as a kid, despite being scared of bullying and retribution, I made a grown up choice to stand up in direct opposition to the mass and do the right thing. It shaped me into who I am today.
Today I am thankful for the countless men and women - gay, straight, bi, transgender, or transsexual - that stand up for equal rights and tell the world bullying and refusing human rights to a person because of their sexual orientation is wrong. I’m thankful to the brave souls of Stonewall. I’m thankful for the Trevor Project. You are helping kids who are being bullied choose life instead of suicide by letting them know there’s nothing wrong with being gay. I’m thankful for We Give A Damn and its supporters.
I’m especially thankful to the straight men who realize being a REAL man means you don’t throw around homophobic language like “no homo” or “that’s so gay”.
Dear men and women who adopt anti-gay language - how fortunate for you to live so freely and to be afforded such freedom of expression without perceived consequence. You all forget with freedom comes great responsibility. I urge you to be a leader fuelled by compassion, not a sheep fuelled by ignorance. Please change. Our children need strong role models. Society is only as strong as its weakest links and you are currently a very weak link. A kid is committing suicide every 17 minutes because people like you adopt hate so casually. I have full faith that none of you would ever wish that kind of harm to a child or their parent. You can convert your hate to something greater: love.
Real men aren’t homophobic. I’m so thankful for real men like Tony Porter, the Red Sox, the boys of Hellcats, Gareth Thomas and Jesse & Eric from Modern Family.
This post is dedicated to every single child and adult that has been bullied, beaten, murdered or committed suicide for being gay. This post is dedicated to the incomparable and forever missed David Kato, Ugandan activist for gay rights, who was beaten to death with a hammer in his own home by men who hate gays. And most importantly, this post is dedicated to the men and women that still choose to adopt hate and ignorance. It’s never too late to change. May you sincerely find your way. Today, I give thanks in advance, for you finding your way.
